Rating: 2 out of 10.

This episode…. it’s a rich text. Something about it feels so specifically dated to 2007: the economy hadn’t crashed yet and there was an optimism in the air, the brides are ruled by deep side parts and chunky designer sunglasses, and social media wasn’t dictating the wedding dress trends at Kleinfeld’s. Yet again we have an episode of Say Yes To The Dress where no bride actually says yes to the dress.

Even though these brides are on a reality show, none of them seem to be performing, trying to bolster their Instagram following, or manufacturing drama to create a storyline. It’s both refreshing and boring all at once. Ironically, SYTTD premiered only two days before Keeping Up With The Kardashians was unleashed on the world and a year after The Real Housewives of Orange County. SYTTD has a much narrower scope than either of those shows, but it reflects a very specific slice of American life in that time period in the same way.

This episode is specifically structured around the brides getting married on 07/07/07, a lucky wedding date. According to Elise, weddings for that weekend in July are up 75% over their previous years. Hilariously, all of the brides in this episode insist that they picked that date by complete accident.

Our first bride of the episode is Amy, who is the only bride in this episode not getting married in July. Amy is an older bride and extremely no nonsense, and she’s getting married to a Scottish Episcopalian priest. Her wedding is taking place in the morning at her fiancé’s church, with his entire 1000-person parish in attendance. Unfortunately for Amy, she’s paired with my enemy, Claudia.

I think it’s safe to say that the editors of this show hate Claudia as much as I do. Her first appearance in this episode is showing up late to the morning meeting. She then explains to us (again) that she was moved to a fitting room closer to the manager’s office because she’s under supervision. The omniscient narrator of the show tells us that, “Claudia’s performance continues to disappoint, and she’s under review yet again.”

Listen. I don’t like Claudia either! But they are really laying the villain edit on thick here. It will not shock you to know that Claudia does a terrible job with this appointment. Amy falls in love with two dresses: a classic, romantic, lacy sheath dress and a fuller, strapless, satin a-line gown. Joan, who has intervened into the appointment, tells Amy to go have lunch and come back, and then she can make a decision.

When Amy gets back from lunch, Claudia (who has cleared her entire schedule to help this bride, she claims, but I suspect she probably just didn’t have other appointments) discovers that the lace dress has been taken by another consultant, Vivian. This immediately becomes a problem. After badgering Vivian for the dress, Claudia takes matters into her own hands and straight up steals it from the fitting room and puts Amy into it.

This is the point of the episode where it becomes clear that Amy will not be buying a dress today. She’s already feeling pressured to make a purchase, she’s mad that Claudia only pulled dresses at the top of her price range, and now she’s feeling rushed in the dress. In the middle of this, Vivian storms into Claudia’s appointment (a bad move professionally, but also legendary) and demands the dress back. Both of them escalate this to the managers.

Amy was already pissed at Claudia for her behavior, and tells her how pushy she was being. Claudia insists in a confessional that she didn’t pressure Amy at all, and then the editors play an entire montage of Claudia pressuring Amy into making a decision right now. To absolutely no one’s surprise but Claudia, Amy leaves without a dress. I’m starting to understand why her sales are so low.

Our second bride is Tina, a 07/07/07 bride, which is only two months away. I like Tina! She’s brought her daughter, her sister, and her wedding planner, and none of them bring any drama whatsoever. This is both Tina and her fiancé’s third wedding, and they are getting married on the Brooklyn Bridge, followed by a reception in her backyard. She wants something flowy, simple, casual. Tina is paired with the very capable consultant Audrey, who immediately scours the store for dresses that Tina can get in her short time frame.

Luckily, Audrey is great at her job. After a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it Pnina Tornai cameo, Audrey comes back with three dresses for Tina to try, and she falls in love with two of them.

Tina is indecisive, and the episode doesn’t circle back to her at all. Does she say yes to the dress? No idea! Honestly, I hope she gets the second one. It looks fantastic on her. This entire section was lovely to watch, and her daughter was extremely charming.

We get two (2!) alterations brides today as well, both of whom are 07/07/07 brides.

This graphic, by the way, is what I was talking about up top when I described this as a uniquely 2007 aesthetic. Anitra’s entire outfit here was peak-2007 fashion. She looks like the meanest girl at my high school.

Anitra is here for her second fitting with her future mother-in-law. She describes the first fitting as a disaster, where “everything was wrong” with her dress. From what I can tell, the main issue is that the seams on the bodice were puckering and that problem has since been fixed. That doesn’t strike me as a wedding-ending problem, but whatever.

I am 100% sure that I wore the school-dance edition of this dress in 2007, but the puckered taffeta skirt was probably purple and the bodice was probably black. I’m sure there was a statement belt. This is the formal version of that and it has aged just as well.

Giselle is getting married in Panama on 07/07/07, and she is leaving with her dress for her wedding tomorrow. She’s brought her mother to the fitting, and her mom gets extremely fixated on being able to see the lace in Giselle’s skirt. This is fixed with a very easy tack.

I don’t have a credit for this dress, but I’ll eat my shoe if it’s not a Pnina Tornai original: reigning queen of naked corset bodices that haunt my nightmares.

This episode wasn’t necessarily bad? It suffers from being extremely boring, with the only drama driven by Claudia’s extreme incompetence at her job. Normally I love when the drama comes from the brides or their families, but it doesn’t work if I agree with Amy. Claudia is being the worst, and her annoyance is justified! I can’t tell if SYTTD wants me to empathize with Claudia or hate her, and I think that confusion is making the show worse.

SYTTD has spent more time with Claudia than literally any other consultant. I am praying that she fades to the background when Randy finally makes his first appearance, because I would rather spend time with literally anybody else.

Final Score:

  • Bride needs a dress in under 2 months – +7 points
  • Designer Cameo – +5 points
  • Manager intervention – +5 points
  • Claudia is bad at her job – -3 points

Total: 19/100

I hope visions of naked corset bodices haunt your nightmares too. Bye beautiful!

Related Posts

One thought on “SYTTD: S1, E4, Pt. 1 – Lucky in Love

Comments are closed.